All about me!

Our love story ended in a block..

As part of my 'getting out there 2020 plan' I decided to go on another date. This one, we spoke consistently for 10 days or so. I was a bit stand-off ish to begin with but I really started to feel him. We spoke about all sorts and the conversation flowed well. I wasn't sure... Continue Reading →

Back in the game … kinda :-/

It's hard to blog when your identity is no longer hidden. Whilst typing this opening sentence I decided to take the web address to this blog down from across my social media. I want to be real as possible again .. my current settings meant that the men I have been seeing (if you could... Continue Reading →

When Love Island triggers …

.. I love reality TV. My escapism, my date night. Being single can get kinda lonely and investing your time in complete strangers actually strangely has a positive effect to my life. When I saw Anna and Jordan grow close and saw them falling for one another I felt happy, felt like there was hope.... Continue Reading →

Days like these ..

When you want to cry but there are no tears, your heart feels heavy, your mind feels stuffy. This is my current state. I feel like I want to shout so hard, but I have no words. I am numb. My past feels like just a nightmare that I didn't really live. I sometimes feel... Continue Reading →

Merry Christmas

2019 is not far away. Recently I've been ok, but only ok. The ex is still in prison and I have visited him. I feel it's the best thing to do for our daughter and a small part of me still feels like it is my place to make sure he doesn't feel alone and... Continue Reading →

Here we go again…

Again a few weeks have passed and my life has not stopped. His last disappearance actually had an explanation and something happened that possibly should of meant we could say goodbye but in fact it only bought us closer together. He hasn't been particularly abusive since, or controlling and apart from the last blog post... Continue Reading →

I’m still here..

.. and I'm still battling. Months have passed since my last blog post and I felt like I had my control back. The ex was 'manageable' shall I say and other than just believing that my only hope of ever moving on properly was when his lifestyle finally caught up with him, I was doing... Continue Reading →

Lies and deceit

I have never felt so betrayed by a group of people in my life. So betrayed and angry that I actually fell for the bullshit. I worked out for myself along time ago social services could not be trusted but I thought I had support with some others. Especially since to my face they are... Continue Reading →

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