I don’t know any other way to put it other than today the beast of the mother in law and myself came to blows!! I wish it hadn’t of happened over the telephone but it did, and it has and now I just need to get over it and hope she drops any stupid grudge she has against me too.
I explained briefly on Sunday that there was some animosity between us, she’s lied in the past. She’s behaved distant and just plain odd previously and our relationship just became pretty strained and I never understood why. Early on she was like my rock, we spoke alot and helped each other through the grieving process of him going to jail then something changed.
In February 2015 she told me some things that explained it all. I don’t actually blame her for having these thoughts after all he is her son and I am 7 years older than him with a daughter from a previous relationship but I just explained that being in a relationship does not mean he cannot still have a life. She implied I would hold him back basically, that he was too young to settle down and he has his whole life ahead of him. It was hard to hear but it didn’t turn into an argument on the phone at all. The vibe between us just changed. Other things added to this too, like the time she lied about even booking a visit to see him, ignored my text messages, told my best friend one thing and me another. It was all just strange and I figured I was better off away from it.
Baring in mind I have not even spoke to the woman since January but I hear from her daughter that yes she doesn’t like me and its for all the things she has previously said to me about controlling visits, pushing her away and trapping him. PLEASE!! During the second half of his sentence I didn’t even go to see him much, she could have visited no problem.
Today it came to blows, she denied ever saying any of that stuff to me back in February and I just could not believe what she was saying. HOW? Just HOW can someone bare face lie about something like that. I called her a liar, I told her she was poison she said some things about how she didn’t need to bow down to every word I said. But hey ho whatever, she can continue being bitter. It’ll be her loss when she isn’t involved in her granddaughters life the way she should be!
In fairness she did end the conversation saying we need to draw a line and I agreed but I still don’t feel welcome. I still don’t feel like I particularly want to visit there with my baby, but thank the Lord she lives far away.
At the end of the day her son loves me and she needs to just accept that. Yes he’s been an asshole in the past but so have I and what we don’t need is other people adding even more strains to our relationship. Boy we’ve been through enough and what it always boils down to is me and him. No one else matters other than me, him, my eldest daughter and this new little baby I am growing. As long as we are all happy then fuck the rest!!
I almost feel like I’m justifying his behaviour since his release tonight. Maybe I am, maybe I am just accepting that we’ve had it bloody hard. Survived a prison sentence, where I did meet someone else during and then fell pregnant within 2 days upon his release. Men struggle when their women get pregnant generally anyway. It takes them longer to accept the major life changes before them, or they accept them but they try and do everything they can before that time has come. Add that all to the fact that we had just spent 16 months apart and we’ve got a pretty tough situation. We haven’t given up though and that has to count for something.
I am definitely in a positive mood today …. If only that lasted!!