A woman who got lost whilst in love. My story of dealing with domestic abuse and the aftermath.
My experiences in an abusive relationship taught me a lot, it taught me to trust my gut, protect my heart and sadly rightly or wrongly have that guard up when meeting a new man. When I first met this one back in July 2018, he was a bit of an overlap with my ex. I... Continue Reading →
Weekends are easier for me, I don’t usually do much weekends anyway. The only thing different for me really is football... although I did have a night out planned for next Saturday. That’s upsetting. I am so thankful I actually have work to do and can work from home and not everyday is like this.... Continue Reading →
It's Friday morning, Day 4 of 'soft lockdown' and I am in a different mood right now to how I felt yesterday. These emotions are so up and down, it's exactly like a break-up or a toxic relationship. Very unsettling. Maybe this sadness is added by the realisation the thing with the 'friend' has ended,... Continue Reading →
.. and that he is! I feel angry with myself if I am honest. I saw the signs, chose to ignore them, figured he would actually tell me the truth since he always did before, and was adamant I wasn’t interested in him ‘like that’s but I am angry and need to write. The ‘friend’... Continue Reading →
Yesterday was Monday and the first day of 'home schooling', it went ok. I got quite a bit of work done but it was stressful at times. Somehow my garden looks like a tip (due to the kids emptying the shed) and I had to lay down some rules. I had my niece as planned... Continue Reading →
I could get quite used to being able to blog in the morning. Usually it has always been the evening (or the middle of the night when I have been unable to sleep). I got a little over 5 hours sleep. No alarm needed and like clock work I wake at 6am. It's a Sunday... Continue Reading →
How am I going to get through these times I ask myself. I go from feeling like 'everything is going to be ok, it's an adventure, it's an experience.. it's just different and we can adapt' ... to thinking .. how will I cope? I have no normality. I had been feeling very low coming... Continue Reading →
Tinder can be crazy at the best of times, like with the opening message I just received of ‘when we meeting then?’ I did reply telling him he must be joking but it seems he was not. He then asked if I just wanted a pen pal. Do women actually meet men that quickly ?... Continue Reading →
As part of my 'getting out there 2020 plan' I decided to go on another date. This one, we spoke consistently for 10 days or so. I was a bit stand-off ish to begin with but I really started to feel him. We spoke about all sorts and the conversation flowed well. I wasn't sure... Continue Reading →
It's hard to blog when your identity is no longer hidden. Whilst typing this opening sentence I decided to take the web address to this blog down from across my social media. I want to be real as possible again .. my current settings meant that the men I have been seeing (if you could... Continue Reading →
Behind These Bluest Eyes 