.... I signed up to the half marathon in September! This time no one can get in the way of my training. It did actually pop into my head earlier about how unreliable he was. "Baby I got you, were a team, you are my world. 100% I will be there in the morning so... Continue Reading →
What ifs ..
Once again I fell asleep in the evening and have woke up feeling meh. I've been awake an hour and I've just been feeling really negative. So I need to switch that up! The negatives is of course him, and also the thinking of 'what ifs'. I would never ever wish my daughter away, I... Continue Reading →
Back to reality!
Omg it hurt. It was dark when I woke, and I felt so tired all day. I have won at no caffeine ✅ but my steps are low - less than 5,000 ! Bad! I need to get back to loving the gym. It's hard when it's so dark, and so so cold. I have... Continue Reading →
Preparation, plan, focus!
I've only just started writing in my 2018 diary, transferring the stuff over from my old one to my new one. Today hasn't been as structured as I would have liked. I slept until late and before I knew it it was 2pm. I have applied for an extension on my essays, I'm hoping I... Continue Reading →
My ‘love’ back behind bars !
Took the police 5 weeks to catch up with him. 5 weeks!! I warned him he needed to do it before we had our social services meeting, despite his promises he just didn't. Scared he was going to jail he told me. I did not think it would come to that! Just did not. I... Continue Reading →
I was desperate
So many emotions , so little calories consumed and many tears. He did come home after day 6, denying he was at the girls house. He came in at 2am, I stuck to my word and did not succumb to his sorrys and pleas. I would not fall for it again and have sex with... Continue Reading →
Day 5
Woke up at my friends house and felt quite strong. I think it surprised her and we spoke about it. I agreed that him not having anyone made it easier but equally I've learnt from the last time! I went home about midday and I was greeted by the vile character again. Moaning how I... Continue Reading →
Day 4
The first day I went over on my calories... I still ate less than 1500 but my exercise wasn't great and so I didn't have enough in the bank. I am already feeling slimmer though so this is fabulous! Ex came to see me today, oh how sorry he is, how he can't lose me,... Continue Reading →
Day 2
Successful day on plan. Amazed that I got on the scales for the first time since before my birthday and I had actually lost a pound. Not going to lie that helped greatly with my mood. Calories I consumed today was 1540 which is still under target according to my Fitbit. Exercise needs to be... Continue Reading →
Day 1
Not blogged in a while, but that doesn't mean nothing has happened. I've had many more failed diet attempts and quite a few more rows in my relationship. Today life has gone semi back to normal after the Christmas and New Year hype and it's about time I combatted this weight properly and for good! ... Continue Reading →