Took the police 5 weeks to catch up with him. 5 weeks!! I warned him he needed to do it before we had our social services meeting, despite his promises he just didn't. Scared he was going to jail he told me. I did not think it would come to that! Just did not. I... Continue Reading →
A day without crying ?
I woke up yesterday with a sickness bug. I hate being sick. I hate it even more when I have no one around me to take care of me. It made me feel emotional, I couldn't believe it was now entering the fourth day without contact with the ex. How was he feeling?! Does he... Continue Reading →
How am I feeling?
The question on all my friends and families lips right now... how do you answer such a question when each hour my feelings change so much ? I feel weak, then remind myself what he's put me through and realise weak I am definitely not. My world was falling apart when my baby was just... Continue Reading →
The first day I went over on my calories... I still ate less than 1500 but my exercise wasn't great and so I didn't have enough in the bank. I am already feeling slimmer though so this is fabulous! Ex came to see me today, oh how sorry he is, how he can't lose me,... Continue Reading →
I I really need my confidence back, I need my body back. This picture shows how much confidence I did have. I did well for a week and then I kind of went off plan. I'm about to go serious now though .. 20 days until my birthday and my first proper night out! If I haven't... Continue Reading →
It needs to be goodbye …
In just little over a week I've managed to put myself through more heartache and stress. I just knew getting rid of his clothes would some how come back like it's my fault.Even said I should never have chucked him out in the first place as that's why it went wrong. I've at times felt... Continue Reading →
Baby had her first bottle 🍼
It hasn't been an easy decision and I did ignore the health visitors advice for a week. The breastfeeding gurus on Monday told me to just feed more but realistically with this current set up it's pretty impossible. I don't have the support a woman needs who wants to exclusively breastfeed, I still get pain... Continue Reading →
Baby’s first hospital trip
It's pretty scary for mother to see blood in your baby's sick as you can imagine ! I first called NHS direct at 3:45 am on Monday morning. What a surprise Dominic wasn't contactable. We went for lunch on Sunday as planned and we ended up being together for like 8 hours. It's one thing... Continue Reading →
With a new day comes new strength and new thoughts ..
Saturday morning and I woke up feeling sad. Baby just 3 weeks old and her daddy isn't around. I felt like I just wanted to him home, I wanted him there to have family time in our bed. Enjoy our new baby together. I felt just shit. On Friday he told me he wanted to... Continue Reading →
My baby is 3 weeks old !
Today my baby is 3 weeks old , she is so alert and everyone who sees her can't get over how beautiful she is. This makes me sad that her own father is missing out on this joy. I woke up feeling low again. More disappointed that he hasn't attempted to find out how she... Continue Reading →